Thursday, February 26, 2009

Defeating the Balrog (aka the PhD Thesis)

I have recently finished a complete first draft of my PhD thesis: a major accomplishment. There were days when I thought this might never happen. Much work still needs to be done, but as Brent reminds me, the genius lies in the editing.

Getting to this point has brought lots of hard work and long hours. I feel as though I have been permanently chained to my desk for the last few months. I’ve had minimal contact with the outside world, minimal focus for things other than my thesis and minimal physical activity. Needless to say, I would not recommend this way of life for very long. Luckily, it has been temporary, and the end is in sight. I already feel like life is a bit better. I have lived through this and have come out the better for it on the other side. I feel a little like Gandalf the White after he defeats the Balrog in the Mines of Moria (see photo below). His description of these events to the members of the Fellowship when he returns bears striking resemblance to my life of late:

“Through fire and water, on the lowest dungeon and the highest peak I have fought him [the thesis]…until at last I threw down my enemy and smoked its ruin along the mountainside. Darkness took me. I strayed out of thought and time…and everyday was as long as an ice age on the earth. But it was not the end. I felt life in me again. I come back to you now at the turn of the tide.”

So it is the turn of the tide. There are 30 months, 292 pages, 150 sleepless nights, 2 moves between countries, 6 temper tantrums, 1000 chocolate covered almonds and 5 pounds of weight gain behind me. But the tide coming in brings with it a new perspective on life, a few weeks of editing and polishing, a fun trip to England in July, the promise of new opportunities for work and play, and a chance to remember what I like to do to relax and have fun. I am no longer Beth the Grey, but Beth the White. I like her already!


Friday, February 20, 2009

The Ruby Files

This may be the most pathetic post yet but I have to do it anyway. No I have not turned into a crazy cat lady, but I do have random wanderings of my brain when trying to write and edit my thesis (as all good PhD students do) and I thought I should share some of these wanderings.

Ruby has been living with us for over a year now. She has been my steadfast companion during the long hours of data analysis, writing and editing that have been taking over my life lately. I think she may need an honorary degree by the time I graduate. Some days it is hilarious how much her behaviour mirrors mine. She really has mastered the PhD student impersonation! Here are a few examples:


Sitting at my desk. It's pretty much all I do these days

No...I can't bear to read any more books or articles!

Is reading the paper considered procrastinating?


I can't take it anymore. I am quitting!


Brent reminds me there is an outside world


This draft chapter I wrote sure is nice to sleep on.

This pretty much summarizes my life lately. Somehow it seems more fun when the cat is doing it though. I think Ruby may have to be included in the acknowledgments at the beginning of the thesis. And I better start shopping now if I am going to find a cap and gown in her size for convocation. Dr. Ruby. That has a nice ring to it.